Looking Forward to Another Year

Looking back at all the things that have happened over this year, it is truly amazing to see all that God has done. It is funny how at the time, it may seem as though God is not doing anything, but when we step back and really reflect, it is AMAZING at how much His hand really is upon our lives. God beginning to reveal some of His plans for my life. I am excited for what He has called me to do, but at the same time I am unsure at how He is going to bring it all about. That is wonderful thing about our God though, we don't have to worry about it, because He has already figured it all out. WHAT A BLESSING. This year has been full of blessings, but has not been without sorrow. I am heart broken to learn about some of the choices people in my life have decided to make. I can only pray that this coming year, God will do whatever it takes to bring them back to His feet. I look forward to the mighty plans God has, and can hardly wait to start this new year's exciting journey.

A Mother's Love

As Mother's Day approaches, I find myself trying to think what to get for my mom. Every year I struggle to think of the perfect gift. While I was growing up, I always thought that my mother was the perfect example of love. Not only did she dedicate her time to her children, husband, and family, but she also reserved time to spend with God. Her passion for her maker was always so strong, that it seemed to just bubble out of her. When I think of Mary and who she was to Jesus, I often wonder if he also felt so blessed by her. Remembering the little things that I've shared and done and the conversations that we have had, I will cherish those moments with my mother for the rest of my life. Jesus, probably has so many of those as well, and a bond that grew as deep as the roots of a great oak tree. The mother and child relationship is so significant, for the place that a mother fills is one that comforts with an unconditional love. She is a creation that offers an example of how God loves us. Her grace, beauty, and faith is a witness to us of how to live our lives. Walking with grace in the things that we do, finding beauty in all things and in God's creation, and having faith that God will provide for all our needs and that we will come to know Him as Lord from the depths of our being. It is these things that a mother gives to her children, through her love and her walk throughout life. There are many who have grown up without, or with broken relationships with their mother. The hurt that becomes so familiar is one that can tear the soul apart, consumed with bitterness. But wait! There is hope, God comes, He heals, and HE loves. He can take that relationship and make it new! He can also take, step in, and fill that spot becoming like our mother. He is also so faithful in His love, that He will always bring someone into our life that we can look to as a mother. God never fails, He never ceases, He never abandons. He will always provide, even when it is a mother. I thank God for the woman that my mother is. I would not be who I am without her. I know that I will find a gift, but it can never show her my deep appreciation for the effect she has had on me. I only hope, that one day I can thank her by being the kind of mother she was, for my own children. God bless my mother, for You have made her to be such a blessing to everyone her life touches, especially mine. I love you mom.

Butterflies

April has turned out to be an interesting month. There have been so many things that have happened and still so many things to look forward to. I recently was blessed to hear that my Grandma, who had the stroke, accepted Christ as her Lord and Savior. After so many years of praying for her salvation, I am so tickled to know that she will be there in eternity! God really used this experience, her stroke, as a lesson on how he can bring good and blessings from any situation. I love how God can turn things around for the better. He is constantly asking us to put out trust in Him and just has faith that He is in control. When we do that, really let go of reins and just trust, He pours out His amazing love and blessings.
This last weekend was our Jr High lock-in, and what fun we had. There were about 15 kids with our church and one other combined. It was really sad to see how fast my youthful energy is slipping away, it was very hard to keep myself awake for the entirety of the evening. It was so exciting to spend time with these kids and get REAL with them. God allowed me to have the opportunity to speak into their lives, and them the chance to speak into mine. I thank God how He uses us and those around us to help mold us into who He has designed us to be.
There are still so many things to come this month, this summer, and the rest of the year. I get butterflies ever time I try to imagine what God may have on the road ahead. It is in those moments that I have to just sit back and enjoy the ride, and try not to miss anything along the way. At the same time, I pray that maybe God would consider letting some things happen sooner rather than later. But, I trust what God is doing, and I know He has a reason as to why some season last longer than others, and that He is using this time to work on me to prepare me for the coming seasons. I thank you LORD that you love me so much that you do not leave me the way I am, but are constantly molding me into the person you have created me to be, more like you, my loving FATHER. I love you with all of my being.

A Love Call

It has been a long time since I have had a chance to just sit and write. There have been so many things that have happened in such a short amount of time. My grandma had a stroke a few weeks back. It was very sudden and with still no real explanation of why. She is only in her sixties, and before the stroke she was incredibly active both physically and mentally. She was still working, and I believe that she was doing so partly to help me with tuition for college and also to keep her mind healthy. She is such a giving woman, and she has been so quick to help me in every way she can to help me succeed. So for the last few weeks we have been talking to all of Albuquerque relatives to keep updated in her condition. She lost not only all of her mobility on the left side of her body, but she no longer even recognizes that there is a left side. If you stand and talk to her on her left side, she has no idea that you even exist. So last night I had gone to bed pretty late, and was planning to get up early to go pray for a little girl. Around 4:15 in the morning my phone starts ringing. Completely out of it, I thought that someone was calling me to tell me that I was late for prayer. So I instantly jumped up and grabbed the phone, noticing as I did that it was my grandma who was calling. Confused, I answered. When I heard her voice, my heart broke. The voice on the other end was not the voice of the lady I had grown up knowing. The words were similar and in a sense that they held some familiarity and resembled something once spoken in a past conversation. The voice on the line told me how proud she was of me, how much she loves the cards that we send frequently, that the scriptures meant so much, and how much she loved me. As she spoke I broke into tears. I had heard that since her stroke she had reverted back to a child-like mentality. By the way she used her voice as she spoke and by the very odd time of morning (something she would never do), I knew that the woman with such an intellectual brain was lost, maybe not gone forever, but lost somewhere in her childhood. Not only was I heart broken by the fact that she was truly different, but most of all I was truly touched that even in her state of confusion and unawareness, she was thinking about me, and wanted to call me and tell me that she was proud of me and that she loved me, words I so rarely heard from her. From this God showed me how much HE loves me. I often struggle with wondering how God TRULY feels about me, and the moment I hung up that phone He spoke to me. He told me, "If you think that's love, you cannot begin to know how much more I love you. I just wanted to give you a glimpse of my love for you at time that I knew you would need it."

God is so faithful

It's amazing how easy it is to get caught up in life with the everday things. I was driving to work today and stopped at a red light. I looked up at the mountains in the distance and noticed the beautiful, dark, purple coulds that hung around the peaks of the mountains. It looked as though God had painted a piece of Himself in the sky. I love looking at God's masterpieces, and I love how He knows what touches me, the little things that can make my whole day worthwhile. It is amazing to me how often I forget to notice the little things during my busy days. I often get caught up in what I have to get done, and how long I have to do it, that by the end of the day I have not left enough time to really stop and listen to what God is saying to me. I love that my God is so faithful, that even on those days where I am so caught up and stressed out, He can erase all of it with one look at His amazing artistry and glory. With just one glimpse at a cloud on a mountain, God can make my whole day, and remind me of what is truly important, serving Him in all things, in everything that I do. Thank you Father for your faithfulness to help me notice the little things in life. I love you with all of my heart.